ONE-ACT FORWARD AND TWO STEPS BACK

MOST TENDER PART

CHANGED TO:
MOVING WITH CHILDREN

2009-10-23

PROBLEMS:
1. New Title
2. A number of smaller conflicts for each character that all avalanche into the big one.
3. A place to start

SOLUTIONS:
1. NEW TITLE

A. UNPACKING
B. MOVING DAY
C. CAREFUL PACKING
D. MOVING WITH CHILDREN ***

2. A number of smaller conflicts for each character that all avalanche into the big one.

A. Valentina holds on to so much about the past. Presents from old boyfriends, doorknobs from places she lived, photographs, address books, keys. Anything like that. She can't let go of the past or any piece of it.
B. Noah isn't a detail-oriented man. He's never known her birthday. Never asked about her parents or where they are. Doesn't wonder what her hopes are. Is just now starting to be concerned with what she wants.
C. She has told painful stories about her childhood, about being left alone and scared, about her mother's depression and he has always done his best to comfort and support her without really connecting enough to collect information and details. A pat on the back when she needs to be held sort of thing.
D. He's not at all embarrassed to have her moving in but she's very embarrassed to be seen doing it. He thinks it proves his potency and makes him a stud. She thinks it makes him look like a fool or a dirty old man.

3. A place to start

A. She is already moved in except for one final item on the truck (something really big so that moving it in means she is definitely HERE.)
B. She has been fighting with the movers and now they are down on the truck, demanding more money before they'll bring up the last, biggest piece. She wants him to go down to deal with them but he's reluctant to, feeling like she made the trouble and it should be up to her to get out of it.
C. The truck is here and the door is open but he needs to talk with her about a few ground rules before she actually moves in. (Trying to clarify details that should have been straightened out a long time before this, like using his bathroom and reading his books or listening to the stereo.)



BIG CHANGE: Noah isn't moving into Valentina's apartment. Valentina is moving into his.




notes:
MOVING WITH CHILDREN: In general, the older the child, the more difficulty he or she will have with the move because of the increasing importance of the peer group. Pre-teens and teenagers may repeatedly protest the move, or ask to stay in their hometown with a friend's or family. Some youngsters may not talk about their distress, so parents should be aware of the warning signs of depression, including changes in appetite, withdrawal, a drop in grades, irritability, sleep disturbances or other dramatic changes in behavior.

The parents' attention before, during and after moving process is crucial and can make a big difference in their children's adjustment to the new location.

Getting ready

Encourage your children to express their feelings, and be honest about your own feelings. Encourage older children to make list of phone numbers and addresses of friends, relatives, and other important people in their lives. It will reassure them to know that they can stay in touch with these important people. Take your children to see the new location before you move and take a walk in the new neighborhood together.

Moving with Children

Involve your children in the packing. Try to stick to your routines. Have family dinners as usual. Let your kids take with them in their own bags things that they don't want to pack, such as blankets or special toys.

After the move

Don't rush and unpack immediately. Spend some time with your kids and help them get acquainted with the new home and the neighborhood. Get involved. Ask your kids how they are doing in school and encourage them to talk about the difficulties.